Walking the Buddhist Path

On the road to nowhere

Photo by Bradley Prentice on Unsplash

I like to sit on the porch when I clip my toenails to prepare for my hikes of the week. This morning I watched an ant drag away one of the toenail clippings. The clipping was bigger than the ant’s body, but even though the ant kept dropping it, the ant picked it back up and moved it forward. The ant’s determination was evident, much like lifting a weighty backpack. I don’t know where the ant’s home was, but at some point both the ant and toenail clipping were gone. What does an ant do with toenail clippings? AI tells me that ants are attracted to the skin particles and oils attached to the clippings and use them as food for ant larvae. Also, the inedible part, ants use the dead nail as structural material for the anthill. There, you’ve got it. Your nail clippings are fodder and building materials for ants. Our dead body parts keep others alive and sheltered.

I’ve been contemplating the interconnectedness of things lately, so the ant story fits right in. Instead of walking daily, I’ve been spending many hours on my meditation cushion, focusing my mind on my breath and body sensations. Doing a retreat sets me firmly on the path. Simplifying my existence temporarily allows me to experience parts of what Buddhist teachings say guide toward illumination, known as Nirvana. Mind you, I’m far from Nirvana, but I see how I’ve made progress on the path toward that illustrious goal. I can sit without getting antsy (pun intended); I enjoy the peace I experience when my mind gets concentrated. The disturbances that arise in that state of peace and tranquility, I can welcome. It means my body is cleaning out stuff I no longer need to carry around, as long as I see it for what it is and can let it go. The hardest ones to let go are attachments to family, both living and deceased. The psyche anchors these attachments deep within itself. It doesn’t mean I have to give up caring, but I do have to accept relations as they are. According to Buddhist teachings, grasping creates suffering. Holding onto the past caused suffering; I can embrace the present moment fully. This is where the ant comes in. I can observe the ant, feeling neither disgust nor excitement. In normal, speedy life, I would not have noticed the ant; I would have been up getting a broom to sweep the porch.

Time expands; hours stretch during a meditation retreat. Practice matters more than time’s passage. We’re on the road to nowhere. Sometimes it seems, nothing is happening, and my mind craves more than breath and bodily sensation. Observing the mental state is crucial at that point. Just noting it takes off the edge. Sometimes, mere observation brings complete contentment.

It’s difficult to put into words what happens during a meditation retreat. When I told others I would be in retreat, some said, “Enjoy”, others said, “Work hard” and some raised eyebrows with the question, “Retreat in summer?”. Isn’t summer for being active, out there, traveling? In my last post, I said a retreat is the best vacation, a total emptying. After 8 days, I feel rested, alert, and peaceful. I also shed weight as I only ate twice a day to avoid drowsiness while meditating. Since I did my retreat at home, my garden got the care it needed during sitting breaks. I studied my plants, found water spigots that weren’t working, learned who needed support, extra water, or protection from the elements. Nothing is more satisfying than walking mindfully around the garden in the early morning with a cup of tea and saying hello to everything that is thriving. It’s amazing how many tasks I accomplished in eight days while still sitting an average of 8 hours on the cushion each day. My concentration and renewed energy made a difference.

Now that summer has arrived, - the solstice is just a week away! - I’ve washed and put away the wool sweaters, hats, and gloves. I’ve moved the leftover woodpile from the porch to the woodshed and brought out the summer picnic table and umbrella. This week afforded me the opportunity to transition from lingering spring to full-on summer. I step into summer feeling prepared. The backpacking, the traveling can begin. So often we don’t have or don’t take the time to move from one season to the next and leave remnants of the old season lying around, and start our summer activities without summer accoutrements available. This pivotal week helped me be ready to take the next steps.

Backpacking is on my agenda. Since my shake-down weekend trip, lightening my load has become a priority. I found super lightweight camp shoes and a summer quilt; a smaller power bank. These will save me 2 lb of load. I’ll forgo my stove, simplifying how I feed myself. I can’t wait to load my pack and check my new base weight. With a lighter pack, a lighter body, and a lighter mind, I can travel more easily.

May you find time to do less this summer. May you lighten your load both mentally and physically. True joy is found in an easier walk on the trail. Let me know in the comments how you plan to enjoy your summer.